There are pressing issues at hand, ladies and gentlemen. Take bird flu, for example. Smart-looking people seem to think it'll be the end of us. That is, if there are any of us left after mad cow disease and SARS. And what about climate change? I know I don't have to tell you the horror that brings. Cyclone Larry just hammered northeastern Australia, and now Cyclone Glenda's got down under in her sights, too. Imagine what would happen if there were anything more important than Australians in these cyclones' paths, like the people of Delaware? I shudder to think.

So why, you might wonder, have we not brought the minds of our scientists and great financial resources to bear on these issues?

Because they were busy studying whether group prayer speeds the recovery of heart patients. And believe it or not, the answer is no. The distant, delusional mumbling of strangers will not help you recover from heart surgery.

Perhaps now that we've solved that mystery we can focus on clean energy or a cure for cancer or something.

Analogcabin @ 2:03 PM
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