You may remember Mary Kay LeTourneau -- the kind-of-hot, crazy-eyed teacher jailed for sleeping with her 13-year-old student. She was the first of her glorious kind. Her act was later aped and, arguably, perfected by the hotter, sluttier, and crazier Debbie Beasley, but you can't replicate perfection. Our Lady of Make a Statutory Wish kindled a thousand masturbatory fires, and those fires still rage today.

Well, Mary Kate's in the news again. This time because she and former student Vili "Can I Buy a Consonant" Fualaau are engaged. And why not? It just goes to prove that the couple that stays after class together, stays together.

Mary Kate discussed her relationship with Vili Walla Walla Bing Bang during an appearance on Larry King, throughout which the round-shouldered host's hands, normally in famous repose on his desk, were conspicuously busy under the console.

"We had a really compatible sense of humor," she said. "Back then, he just loved Rob Schneider, and so did I. We both thought Crank Yankers was awesome, and we'd send those 'Priceless' ads with drunk girls showing their boobs to one another on IM."

"And just our perspective on life... it was the same," LeTourneau continued. "We both really think life's awesome, you know?"

LeTourneau told King she hopes to begin working with incarcerated women. "I yearn to teach again... to get in front of a class full of desirous students like I used to... students that want nothing more than to catch me in their forbidden embrace... and to bend over for them, revealing my bounty...."

She was interrupted by King, who said through labored breath, "Portland, Oregon!"


The Blushing Bride


Debbie Beasley, because any excuse is a good excuse.

Analogcabin @ 10:26 AM
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