Well, TMFTML, you didn't exactly leave me with much of a choice, now, did you?

The world mourned today when the BBC broke news that James Doohan, the actor whose portrayal of Star Trek's Scooty is badly imitated by nerds worldwide, has Alzheimer's disease.

Below is an excerpt of the BBC's pre-obit.:

"His long-term memory seems to be intact. If you ask him how he got his role on Star Trek or [about] D-Day, he can talk for an hour about that. But if you ask him what he had for breakfast, he can't say," said his son, Chris, as he offered his father the October 22, 1998 morning paper and a coffee mug full of motor oil. "Right, dad?"

Doohan's doctors, however, remain optimistic. "It's true that Jimmy has hazy or no memory of any events following the release of Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country, and that this is consistant with the midterm memory impairment usually found in patients in the first stages of Alzheimer's disease," said Dr. Tripp Rayko of Seattle's Methodist Center for Neurological Function. "However, nothing appears to have happened in Jimmy's life following the release of Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country, so it's entirely possible his memory is functioning perfectly. We simply can't say for sure."

Doohan's ridiculously named agent, Steven Stevens, who also represents Jingo the Clowny Puzzler and Jim Croce impersonator Gary "Croce in a Bottle" Sparks, cautions fans against hope. "Jimmy's already been diagnosed with Parkinson's disease, diabetes, and fibrosis. Even if he doesn't have Alzheimer's, I think his beaming days are over, if you know what I mean."

After an uncomfortable silence, Stevens clarified, "When I said 'beaming,' I meant having sex."


Doohan's memory may fail, but a legion of obsessive geeks will always be able to remind him.

Analogcabin @ 2:57 PM
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