It's been an interesting May thus far, at least in terms of the search strings that have led nibby visitors into the folds of this, my velveteen internet mantle. But rather than simply letting the absurdity of the strings dip you into the roiling pot of hilarity, I thought I'd allow each to lead me down the mossy rocked path of reminiscence. Oh we may slip, fellow travelers, but our fall will almost certainly be in love.

"canine diarhea"
No thanks, I had a salad.

Ah, me. But seriously, that more than one person followed this string to my site brings me shame, as I now realize I spelled diarrhea incorrectly when late last week I discussed my dog's digestive problems. My salve is that no one that followed the string here knows how to spell diarrhea, either.

"willie waterbug"
I'd forgotten the story of Utah woman who sued Burger King for prohibiting her to breastfeed in their dining room, and bile crawls up my pipe as I read my original reaction to it.

Considering the search string itself, I think "Willie Waterbug" would be a good name for a gay watersports porno.

"apollo program memorable quotes"
I hope against hope that this string was searched in the process of preparing a corporate training Powerpoint. Perhaps one comparing the quest for quality and customer satisfaction to NASA's storied quest for the moon. Maybe the author of this presentation thought a memorable quote at the beginning of each section of the presentation would lend it some gravitas.

Like an idiot, they clicked through to this.

"buy gavel allentown"
In Pennsylvania, a judge sits impotent.

"camile velasco tits"
Oh, I shouldn't. But maybe just one....

I'll tell you, though. This Google is amazing. It can actually search my thoughts!

"catfuck"
And again. Amazing, I tell you!

"doodie noises"
In my head, this was searched by the same person who was preparing the Apollo/corporate quality presentation. You can only look for Apollo program quotes for so long before you need some relief, and what lightens the mood like some doodie noises?

"f troop balloon"
Nothing celebrates the shenanigans and tomfoolery of Capt. Parmenter and his troupe of rapscallions like a balloon, and with Mother's Day around the corner....

"from last night's episode of the swan i learned that it only ta"
I'm touched by this one, as it suggests that someone searched the exact line from one of my posts, or at least as much of it as would fit.

"david cross james lipton"
Well, I see somebody's looking up the recipe for laughter!

"david cross scientology"
And the recipe for fun!

"dennis kucinich and necrophilia"
And the recipe for eroticism!

"diana degarmo belly"
This one shouldn't be too hard to find.

"diana degarmo's race"
This, on the other hand, is an absolute puzzle. Just Wednesday I was thinking to myself, Her mother appears to be white, but this girl has an almost Samoan look to her. And size. I wonder....

If whoever looked this up found anything out, drop me a line.

Analogcabin @ 2:32 PM
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